This hits so close to home! We were in the thick of it with 2 as working parents, but I wasn’t ready to close the door on a 3rd (and I know you know that growing up with 2 other siblings and wanting the same for your own kids just feels RIGHT). But we used my 36th birthday as Decision Day and decided to pause thoughts of a 3rd at that time. Well, fast forward 2 months and what happened?! I was honestly in a terrible headspace the entire pregnancy, but as soon as our third was born everything just fell into place. She completed us and it all felt right. What’s meant to be will be (craziness and all). It’s not easy, but it’s worth it! Just know you aren’t alone <3
This is oh so relatable 💜 also pregnant with our wanted-but-unplanned third baby, that will leave us with 3 kids unded 3 in just a few short weeks. I'm a military spouse working part-time (and trying to expland my freelance writing) and my husband and I already feel like we are drowning- but we are so grateful and know that this babe was meant to be part of our family. Conception is SUCH a miracle and not something to take for granted, like you said. And like your therapist said, all of these complicated and conflicting feelings can coexist. Thank you for sharing 🙏🏼
Thank you so much for sharing! My husband and I have 5 kids and expecting our 6th…each time it's a conversation but ultimately we are so grateful and thankful for the existence of each child despite the insane fatigue
I've just come across this in February 2026. Firstly, i hope you're pregnancy and birth went well. I really enjoyed this reading, raising little people and keeping a relationship healthy is HARD!! Sending love xx
I felt your words about many things being true at once—motherhood has shown me that in every way. I want a third child, and I can almost see the daughter I haven’t met yet. My husband isn’t sure (he’s the steady one), and the years aren’t slowing ( I’m about to turn 43). Maybe she’s just a dream… but deep down, I hope she finds her way to us more than anything.
I feel this so deeply! I shared a newsletter years ago about the in between stage of not knowing if we should "go for a third" or not. We ended up getting a shocking positive pregnancy test and had very similar reactions to both you and your husband. It was... a LOT! We also had a large home renovation in the works so ended up having baby while in a rental and moving back home when baby was 2 months. Anyway - loved reading this and congrats on baby 3!!
This is very similar to our story, now with baby 5. We were both agreed to be done after 4, we are a single income household and I’m often exhausted by raising our kids. But something in the months prior to conception kept feeling like we weren’t done, and even though we agreed to revisit in a few years, miracle of miracles, here we are with our first daughter due in the fall.
I just wrote about exactly these same feelings and then this popped up on my feed as if it was a sign! We’re going through exactly the same thing. We want a second and time is our barrier. We’re misaligned on timing. I want another now. He wants to wait a bit longer. It brings up so many questions of When is it ever the right time? Can we go through the trenches again? I’m almost 39, what does this look like for my fertility? The majority of the weight (figuratively and literally speaking) is on me, my body, my psyche. I will sacrifice the most, so (selfishly) shouldn’t I have more of the say? It’s all so complex. Thank you for sharing. It feels better knowing we’re not alone.
This is so beautiful. I totally relate to the third baby. I knew in my heart that I was a mom of three from the moment our first was born.
I have heard so many moms describe a feeling of “completeness” when they had all of their babies. I haven’t heard the same from dads. Interesting how we, the bringers of life, have a deep knowing, and husbands/partners who are lacking that same sense.
Beautifully written. I was in a similar predicament, my husband didn’t want a third baby. We have two beautiful children, but I did. It’s too late now due to my age, but there is a lingering sadness that doesn’t seem to go away. Happy for you! Enjoy the third :)
I just published a very similar post and the wise algorithm brought this one up in my feed, but my story has a very different outcome (although I suppose it’s not over yet). Thanks for sharing your beautiful words ♥️
Just read yours and sending you a big hug! The conundrum is so, so hard. For what it’s worth, now that we have three I still don’t feel that sense of finality even though I know we won’t have any more kids. There is a bittersweetness to moving through life and grieving what will not be as we get older. You are not alone! Wishing you the best, whatever is to come.
This hits so close to home! We were in the thick of it with 2 as working parents, but I wasn’t ready to close the door on a 3rd (and I know you know that growing up with 2 other siblings and wanting the same for your own kids just feels RIGHT). But we used my 36th birthday as Decision Day and decided to pause thoughts of a 3rd at that time. Well, fast forward 2 months and what happened?! I was honestly in a terrible headspace the entire pregnancy, but as soon as our third was born everything just fell into place. She completed us and it all felt right. What’s meant to be will be (craziness and all). It’s not easy, but it’s worth it! Just know you aren’t alone <3
Love this story, Em! Similar to mine. Thanks for the wise words. Your fam is beautiful and exactly right ❤️
I appreciate the honesty in this piece and especially admitting that multiple things can be true at the same time. Well said and well done.
This is oh so relatable 💜 also pregnant with our wanted-but-unplanned third baby, that will leave us with 3 kids unded 3 in just a few short weeks. I'm a military spouse working part-time (and trying to expland my freelance writing) and my husband and I already feel like we are drowning- but we are so grateful and know that this babe was meant to be part of our family. Conception is SUCH a miracle and not something to take for granted, like you said. And like your therapist said, all of these complicated and conflicting feelings can coexist. Thank you for sharing 🙏🏼
❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for sharing! My husband and I have 5 kids and expecting our 6th…each time it's a conversation but ultimately we are so grateful and thankful for the existence of each child despite the insane fatigue
I've just come across this in February 2026. Firstly, i hope you're pregnancy and birth went well. I really enjoyed this reading, raising little people and keeping a relationship healthy is HARD!! Sending love xx
I felt your words about many things being true at once—motherhood has shown me that in every way. I want a third child, and I can almost see the daughter I haven’t met yet. My husband isn’t sure (he’s the steady one), and the years aren’t slowing ( I’m about to turn 43). Maybe she’s just a dream… but deep down, I hope she finds her way to us more than anything.
I feel this so deeply! I shared a newsletter years ago about the in between stage of not knowing if we should "go for a third" or not. We ended up getting a shocking positive pregnancy test and had very similar reactions to both you and your husband. It was... a LOT! We also had a large home renovation in the works so ended up having baby while in a rental and moving back home when baby was 2 months. Anyway - loved reading this and congrats on baby 3!!
Thank you!! And love that you have a similar story 🩷
This is very similar to our story, now with baby 5. We were both agreed to be done after 4, we are a single income household and I’m often exhausted by raising our kids. But something in the months prior to conception kept feeling like we weren’t done, and even though we agreed to revisit in a few years, miracle of miracles, here we are with our first daughter due in the fall.
I just wrote about exactly these same feelings and then this popped up on my feed as if it was a sign! We’re going through exactly the same thing. We want a second and time is our barrier. We’re misaligned on timing. I want another now. He wants to wait a bit longer. It brings up so many questions of When is it ever the right time? Can we go through the trenches again? I’m almost 39, what does this look like for my fertility? The majority of the weight (figuratively and literally speaking) is on me, my body, my psyche. I will sacrifice the most, so (selfishly) shouldn’t I have more of the say? It’s all so complex. Thank you for sharing. It feels better knowing we’re not alone.
I simply felt, in my soul, that I wasn’t finished having children.
Yes! I've heard from older women that they never felt done. Never ready to let go of the possibility of more children.
That makes sense, I imagine I'll always feel this way to some degree (even with endless gratitude for the children that I do have!)
This is so beautiful. I totally relate to the third baby. I knew in my heart that I was a mom of three from the moment our first was born.
I have heard so many moms describe a feeling of “completeness” when they had all of their babies. I haven’t heard the same from dads. Interesting how we, the bringers of life, have a deep knowing, and husbands/partners who are lacking that same sense.
Beautiful written! I wrote this a while back ☺️
https://anaharrison.substack.com/p/my-first-year-as-a-mum-of-three
Thank you for sharing.
Beautifully written. I was in a similar predicament, my husband didn’t want a third baby. We have two beautiful children, but I did. It’s too late now due to my age, but there is a lingering sadness that doesn’t seem to go away. Happy for you! Enjoy the third :)
💙💙💙
I just published a very similar post and the wise algorithm brought this one up in my feed, but my story has a very different outcome (although I suppose it’s not over yet). Thanks for sharing your beautiful words ♥️
Just read yours and sending you a big hug! The conundrum is so, so hard. For what it’s worth, now that we have three I still don’t feel that sense of finality even though I know we won’t have any more kids. There is a bittersweetness to moving through life and grieving what will not be as we get older. You are not alone! Wishing you the best, whatever is to come.